being sick for the past week has made me really appriciate my 'mask'its a singing term and it is imposible to sing when your all stuffed up.
I dont know what else to do i have legit tried every vitemin on the rack!

Friendship is like toast either its burns or it goes crispy. With friends you can make them in a life time or in a short period of time. Maybe they will be friends that you have forever or just a few months. But the best part is one person can influence you in a short period of time then someone who has been in your life forever. New people can bring out a side of you thats maybe scared, worried, excited who knows but you learn from anyone who steps into your life in a big way or a small way. Like toast you can get sick of it or you can always be trying new toppings with it. so ill gladly be your peanut butter if youll be my jelly:)

Be free little girl
Whos blonde hair will be seen in every flash of light
Be free to fly away
Please take the world and run

Be free and spread those wings
Take your life and let those bells ring
Follow your heart and stay on your path
If you stray away you wont fall to far
From heavens arms
May you please be free

And when you feel like it’s the end
And they’ve taken all they can
Remember you are you
And when you fall I will catch you
Your story will spread the world

So run little girl
Be free
While you can
That blond braid of yours will change the world
Change how they see
Make them believe
So please be free

Why are some people so ignorant.

I just read an artical about how in some countries they are worshiping hitler and selling Nazi merchandise what the heck is wrong with our world.
heres the link
http://www2.macleans.ca/2010/04/21/the-return-of-hitler/

Bucket List

what to do with the rest of my life...
1. Learn to play piano
2. Build a guitar
3. Design the inside of a house for someone
4. Paint a picture not for school
5. Live in europe for a year
6. Plant a garden
7. learn to water skii
8. Go meet my baby cousin in Arizona
9. road trip with my friends
10. Record a full length cd even if it doesnt sell still want to do it
11. Learn another language( havent decided what one)
12. Graduate High School
13. make my own candle
14. hold a chimpanzee
15. horseback ride on a beach
16. Kiss in the rain
17. go camping
18.Take a year and see the world
19. go on a mission trip
20. Visit Abbie in Michigan
21. Photograph someones wedding
22. sleepwalk
23.go barefoot for a day
24. write a country song
25. read an entire book
26. quit starbucks
27. Play a coffee house
28. swim with sea creaters
29. do a handstand
30.sleep under the stars

this is the view from our hotel in berlin germany. this is adorable<3

thoughtlessly full

I need somthing to inspire me. I have so much that could but it always ends up fading away or meaning less to me everyday. Somedays i dont know how to feel about things like my mom going away for the weekend with her new boyfriend. Am i happy for her? am i mad? do i really care? Is she going to spend more time with him and leave it to me to take care of the house and stuff more? i waisted so much of the last year an a half being angry at my parents for splitting so when i got back from europe i decided i wasnt going to let it bother me any longer. But a few weeks have passed and im starting to feel the weight of it again, and i hate it. Maybe its a combination of things, like school, work, and family. Its not easy to balance it all and i keep planning it out in my mind that this is how you can balance it all this is how it should be but i give up before i start. I want to be able to have the time to sit down and write a song but the only time I have had recently was at 130 am and I was so tired i got frustrated with my self. Any of the daylight hours are spent, cleaning to please my mother and pay her back, doing homework or slaveing away in starbucks. Ok its not that bad I just wish i could make money doing somthing that bettered the world in one way or another.
Then there is school. I feel like school is my excuse for everything, for not going to the gym, for being tired for not spending time with friends or family. But its not really an excuse when its true. I dont care anymore but i care enough to leave it to the last minute and still do it. im 10 assignments behind and i dont even know how i will ever catch up. im getting good marks but when i get a bad mark i dont care anymore. The thing that pisses me off the most is writers craft. Dont get me wrong its a great class, if you want to know HOW to write. But this entire semester has been we get an assignment we get time to work on it we hand it in ....REPEAT! then we have to write our own book with all these steps leading up to writing our own book. It sounded like a great course at the begining but now i feel like im writing to please someone and thats not what writing is for. Writing is a way to express emotion and show it in a creative way to people so that they can relate or think about writing not judge it and give it a mark out of 100. I understand that spelling and gramer and structure are important but what is that teaching me about the future. How will this knowledge help make the world better? I dont even need this class to graduate! I am so close to being done high school and its taking forever to get there. I know i should be thankful to have the opportunity for an education but why dont they try teaching us things that matter to real life. Just saying.